Our DSL router recently self destructed. You’d think replacing it would be relatively straightforward. A month or so later our new, upgraded, super-duper router is running and close to or below dial-up speeds. Verizon’s pathetic effort to resolve this issue is only matched by their bizarre business processes. Here are a few gems:
- They send us not one but two routers. One wired, one wireless. Aside from the cost of shipping two routers and resulting customer confusion, you’d think they’d have some kind of common and single device standard to streamline support. Nope.
- They want the old router back, or they are going to charge us. I dutifully pack the old fella up and ship it back. But wait! A week later the old router comes back home with a note. Seems it is "too old" for them to accept back. "Too old"? Nuts! It doesn’t even work.
- Then the service starts running sloooooooow. Seems they downgraded our service for no apparent reason. Quick fix… but why? ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ARE STILL CHARGING US FOR THE PREMIUM SERVICE!
- Seems that didn’t fix the connection speed anyway. Is still pathetically slow.
- Every call to inquire about the status of our pathetic speed is greeted with the same mindless drivel. "Sir, I can’t do anything until you… Unplug from the wall… Sit and Wait…Plug back in… Open browser… Ahhhhh… I see you have an open ticket… Let me put you through to someone else…. Sir, I know you are frustrated, BUT …. Unplug from the wall… Sit and Wait…Plug back in… Open browser… Ahhhhh… I see you have an open ticket… Ahhhhh… The problem seems to be at our end… I’ve noted this… We’ll see if we can find the problem…" How do possibly expect to a) make customers happy, b) charge them for a service you are not delivering and, c) make money providing such repetitive and mindless service?
- And now, to top it all off, even though we are sill at speeds well below our service level agreement they are claiming to have fixed the problem and there is nothing more they can do. There is something I can do and that is, not pay for the service!
Here’s the rub though – in this age of bountiful choice, it seems the only choice for consumer DSL is to wander into town and use the hyper fast FREE service and our local coffee shop.